I have skipped some days of the challenge that either stumped me or I haven’t been able to answer coherently at this time. I didn’t want to just stop doing the challenge. I’ve chosen to continue and will catch up on those pesky posts by Day 30.
Day 18 of The Single Woman 30 Day Challenge: If you could have a conversation with yourself in high school, what would you say? I bent the rules a bit. I wrote a letter to my high school self as it seemed to work better for me.
Hi High School Me,
I know that you were stressing about a lot of things, and you felt rather insecure about yourself. There was so much going on inside of you, mentally and emotionally, but there was no one that you could have confided in or just conversed with in a meaningful way. You were trying to figure life out on your own, and confusion reigned. I wish that I could have been there for you, but I haven’t yet figured my life out today either. That SUCKS!
I thank you for persevering. You stuck it out. You were depressed a lot, ate a lot to soothe yourself, and read a lot of books to escape your reality. None of those helped you to make better decisions, or gave you confidence in your abilities. Even though you were part of a large family, you felt isolated and alone. Loneliness played a big factor in your life. There was often drama going on around you that you didn’t know how to deal with. I STILL have drama going on that I don’t know how to deal with.
You were afraid of becoming an adult. You were right to be afraid. I suck at it, to be honest. I wish that I could provide you guidance; I wish that I could provide myself guidance, too. But I will say this to you: I am proof that you made it to adulthood. For better or worse, I am the future you. There are issues that I no longer struggle with AND issues that I can’t seem to shake. Life is about making progress, paying attention to what works, and what never did or no longer does.
So, instead of seeing you, my teen self as an embarrassment or as lacking, I see you as forming, learning, stumbling, and brave enough to keep trying.
I love my high school self. You ROCKED!